No One Thinks They're Wrong—And That’s Exactly the Point

Think about it: when was the last time someone did something you disagreed with and truly believed they were doing the wrong thing? Rarely, if ever. In their minds, most people are doing what feels justified, necessary, or even reasonable. No one wakes up thinking, “Today, I’ll be the villain.” That would be not very smart.

We all act based on our experiences, values, fears, and world understanding. And so does everyone else. So when someone lashes out, disrespects you, or acts in a way that feels unfair—it’s likely because they think they’re right. They’ve justified it in their head. That doesn’t mean their actions are okay, but it helps explain them.

Understanding this doesn’t make you weak—it makes you wise. It allows you to replace anger with curiosity and judgment with empathy. It helps you respond rather than react. Most importantly, it frees you from resentment that only weighs you down.

The next time someone wrongs you, pause and remember: they don’t think they’re the bad guy. They’re living in a version of the story where they’re doing what makes sense. And maybe, just maybe, if you saw it through their eyes—you’d understand enough to let it go.